Tuesday, 7 September 2010

Ancient Niddrie Mystery Solved

Researchers from QMU have been getting to the bottom of the famous Edinburgh adage that ‘folk fae Niddrie dinnae wear socks’, with some interesting results.

A group of students camped in and around the Niddrie/Craigmillar area over a period of several weeks. They discovered that whilst people did often buy socks from local retailers, they seldom got to wear them more than once. The reason for this, they say, is bears.

“On several occasions we watched as mums put out their washing to dry,” explained group leader Professor Abraham Munchkin, “only to return an hour or two later to find everything on the line intact bar their foot sheaths. To be honest, the first few times we had popped over to Greggs in the interim so we just assumed the socks must have been taken inside first – they’re quite small, so will dry faster than jeans and stuff. But then we set up some cameras, and it was around that point we began to notice the bears.”

Munchkin hypothesizes that the bears have been using the socks to make puppets to entertain their cubs with.

“We followed one of them home to its cottage, and there was all sorts of detritus outside… Googly eyes, bits of loose thread, that type of thing. And when we looked in through the window, the daddy bear was building a sort of Punch and Judy stage thing out of old cardboard boxes. He displayed remarkable dexterity, for a bear.”

Next year Munchkin hopes to secure funding for research into the possibility that foxes were responsible for the recent theft of a job lot of tap shoes from Fort Kinnaird.

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